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a bit of public humiliation - diaper_slave

i had some shopping to do and wore my disposable diaper and my last pair of Comco plastic pants (i will probably spend the rest of my life mourning the fact that they went out of business). i had wet my diaper several time, but felt confident with the plastic pants as protection. i was a bit surprised to find out that while driving, they leaked and i had wet spots on my jeans. It was a bit humiliation to think that first off, people could see the bulk and know that i was in diapers, but also to see the wet marks and know that i had pissed myself. It was humiliation, but also exciting...i honestly want to be on my way to full time diaper use as a real diaper slave!

Cute Man - centende

You sound like a good slave to me, very eager to learn how to behave!

very inspiring - hairysubjim

This is very inspiring and I am also trying to do the same as you. However, living in LIncoln, Nebraska, not sure I can find a dom/master into this stuff. I\'ve also been drinking a lot of my own piss lately while I listen to hypnosis audio files.\r\nI hope you\'ll post more updates on your journey.

continuing education - diaper_slave

While i do not add to this Journal on a daily basis, as i probably should, i do maintain a level of continuing education! i have almost reached the perfection of being an actual, permanent bed wetter. Diapers and plastic are virtually a necessity each night at this point in my transformation. the very humiliating, and yet sexually exhilarating feeling of being diapered, of being a bed wetter keeps me moving forward. i have stopped thinking about wetting at night, since it happens almost every night. Now my focus is on day time wetting so that i am a permanent diaper slave, who will have no other option but to serve as a diaper-slave for the remainder of my life. This is not to infer that i will live as an adult baby, or that i seek regression. Diapers and plastic pants will simply be my prison, my collar, my chain that binds me to a Master and renders me helpless to His Needs. i am always curious if there are other slaves out there who seek this same type of service for themselves. If you are there, please write or comment. i am very interested in sharing ideas. If there are Masters out there who seek a slave of my ilk, please write as well. i am always interested in Your Opinions and Ideas as well. Having been born to live a life of service, i also seek a Master who desires a slave like myself. Thank You for reading my Journal.

how i see myself if collared and enslaved - diaper_slave

i have spent a fair amount of time thinking of what a Master might or might not do to modify my look. If the question were put to me, as a slave, i think i \'see\' myself this way: a slave should be denuded of hair (body hair represents Masculinity, slaves should be denied this option. That means, shaving my head, my entire body (with the exception of eye brows and eye lashes). Absolutely at least the slave\'s crotch should never been permitted to have hair. the slave\'s nipples should continue to be stretched until they are about an inch long. They may or may not be pierced. The slave should have a septum piercing. The slave should not have any genital piercing. It will be rendered piss-incontinent as the ultimate form of submission and inferiority to real Men. Ultimate the slave must be fully trained to drink the Master\'s Piss and piss it\'s diaper at the same time! This reaction should also take place when the Master\'s Cum hits the slave\'s oral-cunt-hole! The slave should ultimately be trained to understand that it is nothing more than a urinal and a cum-dumpster. i continue to train myself to be incontinent. i have some success at night. i am well on my way to being an actual bed wetter. The humiliation of being a bed wetter overwhelms me sometimes...and yet i find it sexually arousing. i would love to ultimately become both impotent and incontinent and limited to providing service to my Owner. i am sitting here, having my morning coffee in diapers that were wet last night. i am humiliated and yet excited that some Master may read this. i beg Men to respond to me. i want to know if i am anywhere near a base that appeals to Men. Thank You for reading my journal.

doctor - diaper_slave

Today i have a doctor appointment. i am planning on wearing a diaper. i have made a decision to tell my doctor that i am having a problem and am wetting my pants, hence the diaper. basically, i want him to understand that i will be wearing diapers from now on. i doubt i can tell him the real reason, but this should work, besides, i am sure doctors have seen patients in diapers before. if by some chance he asks if i have a diaper fetish (which i doubt), i think i will tell him the truth. he already knows i am gay and that i tend more to the submissive side (as he puts it), so perhaps this will not come as a surprise. i will let everyone know. thank you for reading my journal.

back from my DR - diaper_slave

My doctor did not seem shocked or surprised. He simply asked if I thought I needed my prostate checked. He did some minor tests, and then gave me a lecture on diaper rash. I was not totally surprised, but I did expect some sort of a reaction.

random ramblings about my incontinence - diaper_slave

i have all but achieved my goal of night-time incontinence. it really was a case of simply allowing myself to wet at night, along with the knowledge that i was diapered. it made it easier knowing there would be no wet bed due to diapers. at first, it was a case of waking up, wetting and then falling back asleep. Now i barely wake up at all, but rather remain in a semi-groggy state, wet my diapers and fall back asleep. What this does provide me is the needed sense of daily humiliation and subservience. i no longer find it possible to think, let alone act in a dominant way. Mainly because i am in diapers and because i am a bed wetter. i am not upset about this, on the contrary, i find it sexually arousing! And that is something i quickly deprive myself with the use of a chastity device. i would love to actually be impotent, to find that my sexual drive is totally centered on service rather than masturbation. To surrender my body and my bodily functions to a Master would being me the ultimate pleasure. i sit here now, in a very wet diaper and pair of plastic pants over them. the feel and the smell of my own piss really turns me on. i know it must be something that i offer to a Man every day...it is the confirmation that i am dependent on him. Today, being Saturday, i think i will wear this wet diaper from last night, all day long, continuing to use it for all eliminations while i clean my house. i suspect i will feel like a true slave, even though there is no Master here. i wish there were! The feel of His belt across my legs, or the taste of His spit on my face...these are things i long for. i hope i do not sound too intense for Masters who read this...

just an update, nothing special - diaper_slave

i continue to wear diapers and plastic pants almost all the time. Someone asked me why i wear plastic pants over my (disposable) diapers. i do that because i had an encounter once with an intense Master who told me this: a Man/Master/Dominant wears boxers or boxer briefs, He may also wear a jock strap, an athletic cup or nothing at all if He so chooses. A boi/boy/sub wears briefs. Sissies, fem-boys and tyrannies wear panties, thongs, g-strings, kotex or feminine undergarments. There is nothing left for the slave but diapers....all the other underwear forms have been assigned according to the socio-sexual ladder of conformity. That means...diapers are the uniform of the slave. To be in diapers (without plastic pants) is to be \'in uniform\'. To be in diapers AND plastic pants is to be in \'FULL uniform\'. This slave wears both diapers and plastic pants as a personal training tool in case a Master determines that the slave should be in full uniform at all times. Does anyone else have this same sort of feeling or concept to diapers? this slave also continues to enforce piss-incontinence on itself. it has all but reached the point where diapers and plastic pants are a necessity at night. Otherwise it would be a true bed wetter for approximately 95% of the time. The chance of a wet bed is too much to risk, so it wears diapers and plastic pants as it\'s pajamas. It has only 2 pair or regular underwear left. All the other items in it\'s underwear drawer are diapers and plastic pants. Every morning, it rinses it\'s plastic pants out in the shower and hangs them there to dry.\r\n\r\nThe slave welcomes comments from both diaper wearers and from Dominants with respect to my journal. it longs to serve in such a manner, but also wants to learn from others. Thank You for reading my journal.

the man in the mirror - diaper_slave

i put a sign up on the mirror in my bedroom, and the mirror in my bathroom. They both read: \"i am an incontinent diaper-slave\". Because of this, i have to look at it, read it and deal with it. i have come to be very comfortable in diapers and plastic pants, not as an adult baby, but as a diaper slave. i am diapered because i am inferior on the socio-sexual ladder to Alpha Men, Masters and Owners. It is Their right to degrade and humiliate me because i am both diapered and incontinent. For some reason, i crave this humiliation. i also crave having to expose my diapers and plastic pants to Them so that They can confirm my inferiority. i admit, i long for a permanent situation where a Master collars me and enslaves me in this manner. i do NOT want to be His Boyfriend or Lover. i accept that He has a right to use me sexually if it so pleases Him. i accept that i am indentured to serve His House as the cook, the maid, the butler, the chauffeur, or any other position...whatever He wishes! \r\n\r\ni long to be totally consumed by being diapered. i long to become this slave, that is why i have these signs on the mirrors in my house. The man in the mirror is me, and i am an incontinent diaper-slave.

feedback & direction from others - diaper_slave

If there are any Masters/Doms out there, this slave would be very interested in Your feedback and directions. i am using this as a learning tool in conjunction with the files i am using. i am also interested in the response of subs who might feel similar to me in these areas. Thank you

a first - diaper_slave

Today, for the first time, i wet my diaper during the day, without forcing myself. It just happened. It was totally spontaneous. i\'m not just how it happened, but when it was done. i truly felt like a diaper slave: dependent on diapers, humiliated by having to wear them, and yet knowing that it is totally correct for me to be in them. There is also (and fortunately, almost always...) a sense of sexual excitement to knowing that i am wearing diapers and dependent on them.

an update - diaper_slave

It is Memorial Day Weekend. i continue to wear diapers, most days and every night. i no longer can even imagine wearing anything else to bed. They have quite simply become my pajamas for all intents and purposes. i wake up wet, i wake up humiliated (which i need) and i wake up sexual excited. Being in a wet diaper, makes me feel like a urinal for a Master, that is why i am sexual aroused in them. i wonder what a real BD/Sm Master would think or say about owning a slave like me. If there are any out here in WWM i would be interested in Their comments. my desires to wear diapers on an absolute daily basis seems to increase each day. i find i need to be in them to feel correct...to feel like the slave i was meant to be...that i want to be. i want that level of submission to a Man and to these diapers...i want to depend on them just as i would an Owner.

continuing info on this slave - diaper_slave

As a slave, i have become accepting of my socio-sexual position. It is on the bottom of the ladder of sexual life. This slave is born to and must serve and service Men. It must be trained to be the urinal of the Master and to recycle His Urine into the diaper that is now the underwear of the slave. It has been wearing diapers and plastic pants (almost!) non-stop since it began this Journal. It is completely night-time incontinent and understands and accepts that it is now a permanent bed wetter. Being a bed wetter brings the slave necessary humiliation and also a strange type of sexual gratification. It has come to a point where it MUST be in diapers and plastic pants to even be happy in life. It continues to look for a Master/Owner who will demand nothing but diaper enslavement from this slave object as well as piss-incontinence. It desperately wants this. If there are any Masters/Owners out there in WWM please contact this slave. Please understand it MUST be in diapers. It has gotten to a point where nothing else matters in life.

out of the closet - diaper_slave

i made the decision, about a month ago, to tell everyone in my life that i am a diaper slave. Most of my friends said they \'didn\'t care\', a few of my family members have told me not to contact them anymore, most, again, didn\'t care. They sll seem to have the idea that it\'s perfectly fine...it\'s my life! i did not tell my job (one does have to pay the bills). i have decided to totally submerge myself into becoming a permanent, full-time, diapered toilet slave.

a pig - diaper_slave

i find i am becoming a total diaper-pig as well as a diaper slave. i am becoming totally controlled by diapers. i have to wear them and use them all the time. it is almost like an obsession. i love it. i just want to be in diapers every minute of the day and night. i don\'t even care who sees me or knows.

22 September--looking for a FT Master - diaper_slave

i am now wearing diapers every minute of every day. i have become totally (both physically and emotionally) dependent on them certainly at night, and almost every day. i am looking for a Master to train me as His personal urinal and full time diaper slave. Please write to me if You are looking for such an animal. Thank You!

just some things that happend during the summer - diaper_slave

i was in a State Park and went into a portable potty to change my own wet diaper. When i went to wrap it up in a plastic pant to throw it out, i noticed that someone had taken their own dirty diaper and tossed it into the potty. There it was...someone had tossed it right there for others to see! i was excited by this idea. \r\n\r\nAnother time i was at a store, and was talking to the sales person about some shirts and jerseys and he could not help but see the diaper at my waist bad and asked if i wore diapers all the time. i told him \'yes\'. He asked if it was for medical reasons. i told him \'no\'. i wore them because i was a diaper-slave. He asked me about it and told me he was a slave as well, and we chatted for a while. Then i left. i was excited to know that he was turned on by my being in diapers. \r\n\r\ni was camping in a rather remote spot and spent the whole weekend in nothing but diapers and plastic pants and a tee shirt. i would openly walk around in them. No one was that...that i know...and i felt very relaxes and very free in diapers and plastic pants. i have become a total diaper pig. Consumed by the idea of them, consumed by living in them, consumed by piss them. It\'s very strange, i do feel humiliated and degraded in them, (and i do like that!), but far more importantly i feel \'correct\' in diapers. They are exactly what they should be...part and parcel of my life. They are absolutely a requirement in my life from here on. \r\n\r\ni am still looking for a Master who wants a diaper-slave. Please let me know if anyone finds one! Thank you for reading my blog

last nigh - diaper_slave

Last night i forgot to put a diaper on. i wet my bed. i am really totally dependent on diapers and plastic pants at night. i lay there thinking...\'i have become what i wanted to be...a real bed wetter who is diaper dependent\'. This has happened before...no diaper...a wet bed. It\'s consistent. i am diaper dependent. i want to become a total diaper pig, living in diapers on a permanent basis, know to all as a diaper pig, ready to service Men who can appreciate a diapered urinal pig. i feel like i have such strange urges to just suck Men off all day and all night long. It\'s becoming all i want to do. Suck them off and piss my diaper!!

yesterday - diaper_slave

Yesterday, i decided to listen to several tapes: i listened to \"train diapers: wet uncontrollably when in a safe place and in diapers\"; boy arthur\'s \"diaper slave\" series and then Professor Pig\'s \"Diaper pig tapes\". i really like them. and have listened to them before. i always find them helpful. i want to be a complete and utter diaper pig. While i am a gay slave, i want to service both Men and Women now, as their diaper slave. This change is not a result of my changing my sexual preference but rather something that is happening inside me...because i am and want to be a complete diaper pig, i feel i must service both Dominant Men and Women...even a Demanding Couple.

a comment as i approach the New Year - diaper_slave

i am almost completely piss-incontinent. i would be frightened to move without diapers on me and without a back-up set of diapers/plastic pants. Make no mistake about it...i am totally happy. i love being in diapers whether they are wet or dry. They make me happy. That is all that matters. Now i want to concentrate on finding Dominants who want to use and abuse a piss-incontinent diaper slave. If there is anyone out there, i would be honored to hear from You...thank You in advance...

time - diaper_slave

i think i have reached a point of wearing diapers so long, that i no longer remember what wearing regular underwear, or using the toilet is like. i have become completely diaper controlled and dependent. i know i wanted this, so i have no one to blame but myself, but it all seems sad, not pointless, but sad, since i have no Master to serve as His diapered-toilet-boi! If there are any Masters out there, i would appreciate hearing from You...thank you in advance...

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