The forced gay success thread...

[jacktag]

Well, I for one was at one point exclusively straight and now have a husband and a purse dog; so I’d say it works hun

[Dave564]

I started this thread 16 years ago - not bored at all, just hard to find time to post here while life is happening x

[jr987]

[quote="jacktag"]Well, I for one was at one point exclusively straight and now have a husband and a purse dog; so I’d say it works hun[/quote]

Wow, that's an exciting result! How encouraging!

[jr987]

[quote="Dave564"]I started this thread 16 years ago - not bored at all, just hard to find time to post here while life is happening x[/quote]

16 years is long ago! My kids were about 4 and I could hardly think about loving men for a minute. Now, I have time on my hands, and always glad to hear successes! And how did those 16 years go for you, in terms of your gayness?

[Dave564]

I was more or less fully gay and accepted this about 14 years ago, I'm no longer with the boyfriend who I had back then (although he was an amazing thing that happened to me)

but yeah things are good, I don't have a husband or a purse dog, but I do have dyed blonde hair and am currently chatting about pop music with a guy on grindr

[jr987]

[quote="Dave564"]I was more or less fully gay and accepted this about 14 years ago, I'm no longer with the boyfriend who I had back then (although he was an amazing thing that happened to me)

but yeah things are good, I don't have a husband or a purse dog, but I do have dyed blonde hair and am currently chatting about pop music with a guy on grindr [/quote]

well, that's lovely to hear! did you start out gay and desire reinforcement using this (these) file(s)? or do you think you were straight when you started? I'm really curious about how much of a shift people have experienced.

[jr987]

[quote="Dave564"]I was more or less fully gay and accepted this about 14 years ago, I'm no longer with the boyfriend who I had back then (although he was an amazing thing that happened to me)

but yeah things are good, I don't have a husband or a purse dog, but I do have dyed blonde hair and am currently chatting about pop music with a guy on grindr [/quote]

also curious to learn which files you found most powerful and/or meaningful.

[Dave564]

In my mind I was straight but had bi-curious tendancies - in no way did I believe I was gay though

[jr987]

[quote="Dave564"]In my mind I was straight but had bi-curious tendancies - in no way did I believe I was gay though[/quote]

this seems to be the main thing these files do: help you *believe* that you are gay. Gay behaviors can follow from those beliefs, and if those behaviors bring pleasure and satisfaction, they become the reinforcement. That's my impression of what's going on here.

[Dave564]

I would need a time machine to go back and try to unpack all of this now

I definitely do not believe I'm gay - I am gay to the core.

[jr987]

[quote="Dave564"]I would need a time machine to go back and try to unpack all of this now

I definitely do not believe I'm gay - I am gay to the core.[/quote]

Do you now believe that you were always gay, or do you believe that using these materials made that happen in your life?

[jorna]

I can see how the file can enforce/awaken gayness, but the most awkward/interesting part for me is your heterosexual part vanish too..

Like Dave...you said you were bi-curious. So what happened to your feelings for women? Did it vanish in time or suddenly very quickly? And how to feel towards women now? Don't just notice them anymore or do you still at some level get happy when you see a pretty girl? How do you look now towards the girls you liked or loved before? How do you look back at these relationships? Was it real or was it you figuring out who you are? Doesn't or didn't it feel like a lost when you didn't like girls anymore or didn't get turned on anymore..

[jr987]

[quote="jorna"]I can see how the file can enforce/awaken gayness, but the most awkward/interesting part for me is your heterosexual part vanish too..

Like Dave...you said you were bi-curious. So what happened to your feelings for women? Did it vanish in time or suddenly very quickly? And how to feel towards women now? Don't just notice them anymore or do you still at some level get happy when you see a pretty girl? How do you look now towards the girls you liked or loved before? How do you look back at these relationships? Was it real or was it you figuring out who you are? Doesn't or didn't it feel like a lost when you didn't like girls anymore or didn't get turned on anymore..[/quote]

While we wait for Dave to weigh in on this, I'd be curious to hear about your experience so far with this file (assuming you've been listening). Have you felt changes? Noticed changes in your attraction to women?

[jorna]

I have listened a few times, but not enough. I don't think I'm ready to let my heterosexual feelings go and therefore I don't think the file will work on me yet.

[Dave564]

I believe that when I was young, I bi-curious leaning towards straight - this file was the thing that opened me up to talking to men and being intimate with a man

When that happened - things changed gear and it was my boyfriend (at the time) introduced me to the gay lifestyle - that lifestyle change (along with the file) made me the gay man that I am today, and I'm really proud of who I am.

I don't really know when my heterosexual thoughts faded away, I would say maybe it was a slow process over 2-3 years, but I didn't realise it was happening, I didn't "think" about it because I was totally consumed with all the new things in my life - I should say that I love women, I adore them, idolise them - I see attractive women all the time and think "she's gorgeous" - I have lots of female friends, and have close relationships with them - I can (and have) kissed women (they love it) - and it feels great, but it's not sexual - women are a huge part of my life, they are friendships, and given me counsel - but arousal is just not there.

Identifying as gay is so much more than just these sexual aspects

[jr987]

[quote="Dave564"]I believe that when I was young, I bi-curious leaning towards straight - this file was the thing that opened me up to talking to men and being intimate with a man

When that happened - things changed gear and it was my boyfriend (at the time) introduced me to the gay lifestyle - that lifestyle change (along with the file) made me the gay man that I am today, and I'm really proud of who I am.

I don't really know when my heterosexual thoughts faded away, I would say maybe it was a slow process over 2-3 years, but I didn't realise it was happening, I didn't "think" about it because I was totally consumed with all the new things in my life - I should say that I love women, I adore them, idolise them - I see attractive women all the time and think "she's gorgeous" - I have lots of female friends, and have close relationships with them - I can (and have) kissed women (they love it) - and it feels great, but it's not sexual - women are a huge part of my life, they are friendships, and given me counsel - but arousal is just not there.

Identifying as gay is so much more than just these sexual aspects[/quote]

I relate deeply to part of what you're talking about here, particularly in the following sense: I, too, see women all the time and think they are beautiful and feel very drawn to them; I have also dated women, been married twice, including to my current wife of 22 years. However, when I am alone in my own head--fantisizing (whether masturbatory or otherwise)--I feel so absolutely gay that I can't even imagine wanting to have sex with a woman ever again. It's a completely totalizing kind of experience of homosexual desire. (And I have had sex with several men, starting with a boyfriend I had back in high school, but all of that is far behind me in time; last time I was with a guy was more than 20 years ago). And so when I go out in the world, my feelings of attraction to women confuse me a great deal. And frankly, I'm not sure I really understand the difference, out in the world, between attraction and arousal. Like, am I ever really "aroused" by people I see on the street? I know that I can be very strongly *attracted* to lots of people. Mostly women, in fact. But once I get back home, I become totally gay once again. Very odd phenomenon. I think I use the files to try to flatten out that conflict. I'm not sure that has worked. But it has probably ramped up my homosexual desire beyond the already intense place that it already was!

[Dave564]

The moment everything fell into place for me was when attraction to women turned into admiration, and admiration for men turned into attraction x

[jorna]

[quote="Dave564"]The moment everything fell into place for me was when attraction to women turned into admiration, and admiration for men turned into attraction x[/quote]

I'm currently in that process. The last year I have felt confused with these 2 'Admiration' and 'Attraction' as a theme. Often I wonder what it is what I feel for women. Am I still attracted to them or is it more admiration? And what defines the both? It's so confusing. To me the part of attraction turning into admiration to women is happening, but it doesn't work as a scale to me. It's not like I'm more attracted to men nowadays.

[jr987]

[quote="jorna"] I'm currently in that process. The last year I have felt confused with these 2 'Admiration' and 'Attraction' as a theme. Often I wonder what it is what I feel for women. Am I still attracted to them or is it more admiration? And what defines the both? It's so confusing. To me the part of attraction turning into admiration to women is happening, but it doesn't work as a scale to me. It's not like I'm more attracted to men nowadays.[/quote]

This feels true for me too, in large part. It's confusing to know what to do with it. I assume we are all here interested in this file because we *want* to be less confused and attracted to more men with more certainty. And I assume that for others it is the same way that it is for me, which is that homosexual fantasies are so intensely satisfying, that it feels like I'd be happier if my attractions in the world lined up better with my internal life. Sounds like Dave has found his way to that place.

[jorna]

What's the reason you don't start listening?

[jr987]

[quote="jorna"]What's the reason you don't start listening?[/quote]

Oh, no, I've been listening to this file (and several other things) for a couple of years. I get a lot from it, but there's a sense that the desired finish line--total homosexuality--remains elusive to me. I have certainly come a long way toward integrating my gayness into my full identity, but I'm coming to the conclusion that I may have to accept fludity as the permanent state, rather than being firmly "gay."

[JohnDave]

[quote]This feels true for me too, in large part. It's confusing to know what to do with it. I assume we are all here interested in this file because we *want* to be less confused and attracted to more men with more certainty. And I assume that for others it is the same way that it is for me, which is that homosexual fantasies are so intensely satisfying, that it feels like I'd be happier if my attractions in the world lined up better with my internal life. Sounds like Dave has found his way to that place.[/quote]

I listened to this file for a few months about 10 years ago. and for a little while it made me very curious, it felt like my personality was changing, my eyes were opening, I was becoming much more outgoing, I chatted to women more, I even started reading womens magazines(!).

My tastes in porn somewhat changed too.. I always loved big breasts and cleavage, I started noticing how pretty women were and how they did their makeup and stuff.

After a while, all this faded away.. I had a girlfriend for a number of years, that fizzled out because apart from her boobs, I wasn't so interested in her vagina(!).

The thing is.. I now regard myself as straight again, I an look at curvy women and breasts and think they are sexy.... but just sometimes I get a craving for men, and I will binge on gay porn.. but this is always followed by a feeling of guilt and a purge, and women again.

It seems like I've been affected by this file on a basic level.. the thing is, I get the urges to listen again and feel myself gradually transform.

x

[five_throws]

[quote="JohnDave"][quote]This feels true for me too, in large part. It's confusing to know what to do with it. I assume we are all here interested in this file because we *want* to be less confused and attracted to more men with more certainty. And I assume that for others it is the same way that it is for me, which is that homosexual fantasies are so intensely satisfying, that it feels like I'd be happier if my attractions in the world lined up better with my internal life. Sounds like Dave has found his way to that place.[/quote]

I listened to this file for a few months about 10 years ago. and for a little while it made me very curious, it felt like my personality was changing, my eyes were opening, I was becoming much more outgoing, I chatted to women more, I even started reading womens magazines(!).

My tastes in porn somewhat changed too.. I always loved big breasts and cleavage, I started noticing how pretty women were and how they did their makeup and stuff.

After a while, all this faded away.. I had a girlfriend for a number of years, that fizzled out because apart from her boobs, I wasn't so interested in her vagina(!).

The thing is.. I now regard myself as straight again, I an look at curvy women and breasts and think they are sexy.... but just sometimes I get a craving for men, and I will binge on gay porn.. but this is always followed by a feeling of guilt and a purge, and women again.

It seems like I've been affected by this file on a basic level.. the thing is, I get the urges to listen again and feel myself gradually transform.

x[/quote]

Some interesting thoughts here. In your case, after listening frequently for a time, do you have an opinion about why you didn't fully change your orientation? The fact you listened frequently 10 years ago would seem to imply that you wanted it to work?

[JohnDave]

[quote] Some interesting thoughts here. In your case, after listening frequently for a time, do you have an opinion about why you didn't fully change your orientation? The fact you listened frequently 10 years ago would seem to imply that you wanted it to work?[/quote]

I don't think I can remember why I listened to it so frequently. I guess part of me though that it couldn't possibly work despite what people here reported. Part of me was excited by gradually realising that something I love so much (big breasts) didn't turn me on anymore.. argh, perhaps the transformation is exciting itself!?!

Part of me wants to try it again, but I'd want to try to supplement it with something else, some kind of lifestyle change I guess?

[jr987]

[quote="JohnDave"][quote] Some interesting thoughts here. In your case, after listening frequently for a time, do you have an opinion about why you didn't fully change your orientation? The fact you listened frequently 10 years ago would seem to imply that you wanted it to work?[/quote]

I don't think I can remember why I listened to it so frequently. I guess part of me though that it couldn't possibly work despite what people here reported. Part of me was excited by gradually realising that something I love so much (big breasts) didn't turn me on anymore.. argh, perhaps the transformation is exciting itself!?!

Part of me wants to try it again, but I'd want to try to supplement it with something else, some kind of lifestyle change I guess?[/quote]

I'm always kind of been intrigued by the posters who say that they used the file because they doubted it would work. That seems like a funny way to tempt fate. Unless that sentiment betrays a deeper, repressed desire for men or something. That seems like a plausible explanation. (Which is not to say that I am asserting that that is the case. What do I know?)

My own interest in these files has always been about trying to make my "real life" attactions more aligned with my intensely homosexual desires in fantasy, porn, etc. (But--I apologize--I think I'm just repeating what I've already said here.)

[JohnDave]

[quote]My own interest in these files has always been about trying to make my "real life" attactions more aligned with my intensely homosexual desires in fantasy, porn, etc. (But--I apologize--I think I'm just repeating what I've already said here.)[/quote]

Do you think if a guy masturbates to gay porn for a while.... they could gradually change their sexuality? Maybe that's something I could try adding if i tried this file again.

[jr987]

[quote="JohnDave"]

Do you think if a guy masturbates to gay porn for a while.... they could gradually change their sexuality? Maybe that's something I could try adding if i tried this file again.[/quote]

Well, yes! I certainly think it wouldn't hurt!! And, if you're into it, I think that is sufficient proof either that the file is working or that you have gay desires to begin with. If you don't get aroused watching gay porn, on the other hand, that seems like it might mean that this avenue is not for you. But I would definitely give that a try and see how it feels. For me, there is almost nothing more beautiful than watching two hot guys making love with each other...

[jr987]

[quote="JohnDave"]

Do you think if a guy masturbates to gay porn for a while.... they could gradually change their sexuality? Maybe that's something I could try adding if i tried this file again.[/quote]

Also, if you decide you really want this to work, you might add some additional files as well. There's a really lovely one called "It's OK to be gay" with an audio by Mistress Clarissa that I think is fantastic. She provides a very supportive and loving voice that's totally different from the "curse" and "forced" silliness of this file we are talking about, and I think goes much farther in the direction of making a listener's gayness totally real. You might consider something like that to amplify and reinforce the whole effect.

[jorna]

I was wondering how this file work;

Is it like 'real hypno' like the file does all the work or is it more like 'he was always gay but after listening many times he is just accepting it.' (Like no 100% heterosexual guy would ever listen to this right?)

[jr987]

[quote="jorna"]I was wondering how this file work;

Is it like 'real hypno' like the file does all the work or is it more like 'he was always gay but after listening many times he is just accepting it.' (Like no 100% heterosexual guy would ever listen to this right?)[/quote]

This is a great question. I doubt that anyone who has had any success with this file can really precisely discern the answer to it. Was I always like this but in denial? Did I become like this purely because of the file? That's very hard to distinguish. My advice: if you're drawn to this give it a try, and see how you feel. Your clearest understanding will come from use, not reasoning ahead of time...

[hypnoslave85]

I've not listened to CFG for a couple or years now, not because I got scared or changed my mind about becoming gay but because life in general got in the way I could not find the time to listen to it regularly and the urge to listen faded. While my newly found Attraction to Men did not and has not to this day fade one I found my Attraction women which had almost completely vanished at the time slowly grow stronger. I would say I'm Bi at this moment in time.

Although when I woke up this morning I had the uncontrollable urge to listen to it, which goes to once this file has gotten its hooks in you there is never really any escape from it.as a matter of fact I have just started the file while typing this, without even thinking about doing so.

[jr987]

[quote="hypnoslave85"]Although when I woke up this morning I had the uncontrollable urge to listen to it, which goes to once this file has gotten its hooks in you there is never really any escape from it.as a matter of fact I have just started the file while typing this, without even thinking about doing so.[/quote]

Seems like we are all a permanent part of this community, whether we want to be or not...

[hypnoslave85]

I have been listening twice a day since my last post, first thing in the morning when I wake up and last thing at night before falling asleep. I had forgotten how hot and dreamy emg's voice is.

[luluby]

I had initially started listening to this quite a while back but I didn't stick with it. I've become interested again and intend on giving this a shot and sticking with it, I'm thinking once a day for a few months. As some others have mentioned, it's just a curiosity if something like this could possibly work.

[broerk]

So, Gonna give my two cents.

I last listened to this file 9 years and after that I fully believed that I was as straight as I could be.

Untill this year. As when I started to finally become more open and accepting of myself and my feelings. Allowing myself to be who I truly am. I started loosing interest in woman and started getting more interest in men.

to be fair though it probably wasn't entirely for me. As I found I mostly like the idea when I think of myself as a woman. Instead of as a guy.

When I am the woman. Absolute fireworks. When I am a guy it just doesn't quite feel right.

So I guess the desire to be with a guy in such a way was always there. I just framed it wrong for myself which made it feel wrong to me. Which made me draw the wrong conclusions. Funny really

[jr987]

[quote="broerk"]So, Gonna give my two cents.

I last listened to this file 9 years and after that I fully believed that I was as straight as I could be.

Untill this year. As when I started to finally become more open and accepting of myself and my feelings. Allowing myself to be who I truly am. I started loosing interest in woman and started getting more interest in men.

to be fair though it probably wasn't entirely for me. As I found I mostly like the idea when I think of myself as a woman. Instead of as a guy.

When I am the woman. Absolute fireworks. When I am a guy it just doesn't quite feel right.

So I guess the desire to be with a guy in such a way was always there. I just framed it wrong for myself which made it feel wrong to me. Which made me draw the wrong conclusions. Funny really[/quote]

So are you trans now? Or is this still just in the realm of fantasy?

[broerk]

[quote="jr987"]So are you trans now? Or is this still just in the realm of fantasy?[/quote]

Well, I haven't transitioned yet. But I am on a waiting list for it.

So for now it's still in the realm of fantasy I suppose.

[jorna]

[quote="broerk"][quote="jr987"]So are you trans now? Or is this still just in the realm of fantasy?[/quote]

Well, I haven't transitioned yet. But I am on a waiting list for it.

So for now it's still in the realm of fantasy I suppose.[/quote]

To me it feels you are just a guy who doesn't feel like a woman, except in bed. So be careful before you transition. I would advice to talk to professionals before you take these steps. Especially if it's just in a sexual context you want to be the girl. Try to remember; have I ever loved a girl? Have I ever truly loved a guy? Which one of the two do I want to be romantic with? Have you ever had real sex with a guy or is it just based at fantasy? You need to wonder; do I really feel like a woman even when I'm not horny. Do you have feminine hobbies? Do you have more female friends as guy friends and where do you feel comfortable? Can you see yourself in female clothing all the time and not only the sexy ones but also the practical ones? Will you feel more comfortable as a woman as a man when you have work meetings? The sex part is just a part of you, but doesn't define you as a whole.

[broerk]

[quote="jorna"]To me it feels you are just a guy who doesn't feel like a woman, except in bed. So be careful before you transition. I would advice to talk to professionals before you take these steps. Especially if it's just in a sexual context you want to be the girl. Try to remember; have I ever loved a girl? Have I ever truly loved a guy? Which one of the two do I want to be romantic with? Have you ever had real sex with a guy or is it just based at fantasy? You need to wonder; do I really feel like a woman even when I'm not horny. Do you have feminine hobbies? Do you have more female friends as guy friends and where do you feel comfortable? Can you see yourself in female clothing all the time and not only the sexy ones but also the practical ones? Will you feel more comfortable as a woman as a man when you have work meetings? The sex part is just a part of you, but doesn't define you as a whole.[/quote]

I appreciate your concern.

But I have been doing more womanly things since I've been 8. I just always pushed it away because even though it was something I wanted. It wasn't something I was supposed to be doing.

Hell at age 13 I was so desperate I was willing to sell my soul to the devil if it meant I would wake up tomorrow and it would all off a sudden be as if I had been born as a girl. That no one would know any better then that I would've always been a girl. this was triggered by a girl walking by and me being very jealous of her.

I have for most of my life tried to push that side of me away. Yet at the same always felt pulled in by it. Cross dressing. Trying make up. Doing womanly things that other guys would reject because it was to "Girly".

For all of my life I have hated it when people would address me by boy, sir. I just don't feel like that's me.

Only for a year now have I truly allowed myself to actually experiment with it.

The first couple of months I would just do it privately. It made me happy. Whenever I had turned myself into as womanly looking as I could. I would have the biggest grin on my face that would not go away. But I was unsure if it was something I truly wanted or if I was just fooling myself. however the more I questioned the more I started to feel sure. Yes it was something I wanted to actually do something with. Instead of just hiding it. I even questioned if I it was just to turn myself on. But I did plenty of just sitting around reading or something and I still felt more happy doing it dressed up as a woman then I do just being a guy.

So eventually I started discussing it with my psychiatrist. She told me that I radiated happiness whenever we would discuss it. Though she didn't just give positive feedback. She would at times suggest maybe trying other things instead of that. But every time she would suggest that I would feel such a strong feeling. That no, I don't want that instead of that. I want to go for the specialized trans therapy. I wouldn't have minded it together with the specialized trans therapy. But no way, no how instead of. So after several sessions over several months(Talking 4-5 months). Constantly rechecking if I still wanted it and me still being 100% sure. She referred me. Took a little long for my taste. But I can understand that she didn't just want to fast track it.

So now I am going to specialized trans therapy and to be honest. The thing that scares me the most. Is that they tell me that I am one of those persons that thought they wanted to transition but was mistaken.

Not because I am scared to end up in the wrong body. But because I am absolutely terrified that they will turn me down and I will never get to transition.

Hell other people telling me I am not actually a trans woman makes me feel depressed.

So while there are indeed people who transitioned while they shouldn't have. Which is absolutely terrible for them. I just don't feel that is me.

While I might never be 100% sure. I just feel like if I didn't want it. I wouldn't get a very strong feeling of "FU yes I do". When somebody tells me I don't actually want it. That I wouldn't get depressed when people tell me they don't believe me. I should be feeling relieved if I don't actually want it. Shouldn't I?

[jr987]

[quote="broerk"]

I appreciate your concern.

But I have been doing more womanly things since I've been 8. I just always pushed it away because even though it was something I wanted. It wasn't something I was supposed to be doing.

Hell at age 13 I was so desperate I was willing to sell my soul to the devil if it meant I would wake up tomorrow and it would all off a sudden be as if I had been born as a girl. That no one would know any better then that I would've always been a girl. this was triggered by a girl walking by and me being very jealous of her.

I have for most of my life tried to push that side of me away. Yet at the same always felt pulled in by it. Cross dressing. Trying make up. Doing womanly things that other guys would reject because it was to "Girly".

For all of my life I have hated it when people would address me by boy, sir. I just don't feel like that's me.

Only for a year now have I truly allowed myself to actually experiment with it.

The first couple of months I would just do it privately. It made me happy. Whenever I had turned myself into as womanly looking as I could. I would have the biggest grin on my face that would not go away. But I was unsure if it was something I truly wanted or if I was just fooling myself. however the more I questioned the more I started to feel sure. Yes it was something I wanted to actually do something with. Instead of just hiding it. I even questioned if I it was just to turn myself on. But I did plenty of just sitting around reading or something and I still felt more happy doing it dressed up as a woman then I do just being a guy.

So eventually I started discussing it with my psychiatrist. She told me that I radiated happiness whenever we would discuss it. Though she didn't just give positive feedback. She would at times suggest maybe trying other things instead of that. But every time she would suggest that I would feel such a strong feeling. That no, I don't want that instead of that. I want to go for the specialized trans therapy. I wouldn't have minded it together with the specialized trans therapy. But no way, no how instead of. So after several sessions over several months(Talking 4-5 months). Constantly rechecking if I still wanted it and me still being 100% sure. She referred me. Took a little long for my taste. But I can understand that she didn't just want to fast track it.

So now I am going to specialized trans therapy and to be honest. The thing that scares me the most. Is that they tell me that I am one of those persons that thought they wanted to transition but was mistaken.

Not because I am scared to end up in the wrong body. But because I am absolutely terrified that they will turn me down and I will never get to transition.

Hell other people telling me I am not actually a trans woman makes me feel depressed.

So while there are indeed people who transitioned while they shouldn't have. Which is absolutely terrible for them. I just don't feel that is me.

While I might never be 100% sure. I just feel like if I didn't want it. I wouldn't get a very strong feeling of "FU yes I do". When somebody tells me I don't actually want it. That I wouldn't get depressed when people tell me they don't believe me. I should be feeling relieved if I don't actually want it. Shouldn't I?[/quote]

This sounds like the right process! And surely, even in the specialized trans therapy there is a long period of living as a woman before anything TOO irreversible happens, isn't there? I'd think it would include a period of adjustment and being sure that it is right for you. And from what you say, it sounds as if it just might be!! Good luck to you! Hoping you find love for yourself (and maybe love for a sexy man along the way, if that's in the cards...!)

[broerk]

[quote="jr987"] This sounds like the right process! And surely, even in the specialized trans therapy there is a long period of living as a woman before anything TOO irreversible happens, isn't there? I'd think it would include a period of adjustment and being sure that it is right for you.[/quote]

Well yea. First I'll go through talks and talks again to make sure it truly is something I should even try. Which I hope it is.

Then when you do start HRT it will take 1-3 months for the first effects to even truly start. So yea I think that is a decent amount of time to try it out and most changes aren't even permanent if you were to stop.

[quote="jr987"] And from what you say, it sounds as if it just might be!! Good luck to you! Hoping you find love for yourself (and maybe love for a sexy man along the way, if that's in the cards...!)[/quote]

Thanks!

The reason it might've sounded just about sexuality at first was because this thread was about whether the forced gay file can make you gay and whether the desire to be gay has always been there or not. So I just mostly focused on that.

The point I was trying to make was that I believe that from my point of view. There probably is a desire to start with. That part of you does want this. When you start this file. It just might not always be obvious where that desire comes from and that can cause confusion.

Because like with me I did want the be with guys part. I just didn't want to be a guy in the equation myself. So I was stuck in a loop of desiring it yet also being scared of it. Until I tried picturing being into guys as a woman. That's when it started to just feel amazing instead of scary and just not quite right.