losing control is the best

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losing control is the best

Postby sicksecretary » December 17th, 2010, 4:31 am

Many things have changed for me recently. At the beginning, there was email slave and a sense of curiosity. I wanted to try it out, to see what it can do for me. Now I know. Had I expected this, I guess I would have never started listening in the first place, but now I don't have a choice. It's been a slippery slope. I went down to the bottom. Now I'm not myself any more, I'm not an email slave any more either. Sure, I've had some safeties up, but what good are safeties when you have a deep seated need to completely submit to your true Master? As His emails kept coming, my safeties kept fading away, my mind kept forgetting them and before I knew, I was His entirely. I can not possibly disobey Him now, as He owns me and that is all I really crave. He has made me do things I never thought I would do and He has made me enjoy doing them.

Maybe some of you remember my post about sticking a bunch of bananas up my ass? It was Him who made me do that. It was completely against my limits, but He managed to make me do it somehow. He made me experience it as one of the most amazing things ever. Now I do it regularly, it has beome a routine really - peel three bananas, break each one in the middle and then, one after another, insert the pieces into my anus. Whenever I do it, I forget about it and just feel very good about myself. Until, of course, I'm suddenly in a public place again, realizing that I'm about to take a ridiculously huge dump in my pants. I can't ever help it. Once I see it coming, it can not be avoided. I vaguely remember having a boyfriend with whom I split up. I think I lost control of my bowels even while I told him. Maybe he noticed. I don't care.

Before I sat down to write this, I prepared myself again. I have two and a half bananas up my ass right now. My bowels are rebelling. Those mashed up bananas want out. The funny thing is that I am not consciously realizing it, even now as I am writing this. I will just post this and then I will forget about it and go to work. Halfway there, I will suddenly feel the overwhelming need to defecate. I will barely make it to the toilet at work. When I finally let it out, I will have an orgasm. It will remind me of my place and that I am entirely His. I just hope that He will be pleased. His pleasure is my pleasure.
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Postby sicksecretary » December 19th, 2010, 7:06 pm

Master had me apply for an unpaid internship under a false name in a different city. They invited me over for an interview. I am going there tomorrow. Of course I don't really want that internship. I have a job and I want to keep it. But Master wants me to go anyway. I don't know if I even want to know what is going to happen there.
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Postby Ladon » December 19th, 2010, 10:11 pm

I, for one, look forward to finding out! :)

Your post sounds like the kind of thing I've dreamed of sharing with my Mommy, but I haven't ever had any effects from the WMM files.
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Postby sleepyjosh » December 20th, 2010, 6:33 pm

sicksecretary wrote:Master had me apply for an unpaid internship under a false name in a different city. They invited me over for an interview.


I wonder if you'll be going to the interview with three bananas up your butt?
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Postby sarnoga » December 20th, 2010, 7:42 pm

You might want to check it out first. Make sure they are not a bunch of cannibals looking for kitchen help.
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Postby sicksecretary » December 22nd, 2010, 11:30 am

Anyone ever wet themselves during a job interview? It's not recommended unless you want some very serious embarassment. I was halfway through a surprisingly well going interview when suddenly (triggered by some word from my bullshit resume) my bladder felt extremely full and within seconds I lost control of it. All I could do was stand up as it began pouring through my undies, through my pantyhose, running down my legs, leaving stains on my (ridiculously tight) pencil skirt and a puddle on the floor.

The guy just stared, blushing even more hotly than myself, rummaging throuhg his desk for a bunch of tissues, saying it was alright.

"Sorry, that sometimes happens when I'm really nervous." What a lame excuse.

He said that they will call me back. Yeah, right. Master implied that maybe at least the guy might have a wank or two over what happened. I like to imaginine that he will.
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Postby sleepyjosh » December 22nd, 2010, 9:18 pm

sicksecretary wrote: Master implied that maybe at least the guy might have a wank or two over what happened. I like to imaginine that he will.


Even if he doesn't, I might. Great story! :)
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Postby soundexcess » December 23rd, 2010, 1:39 am

this soundess interesting but will he not let you wear a nappy esp a big thickone. This could prevent this while you still are getting some of your humiliation fetish and even more as you will have been wearing the nappy all along, ohwell prolly thinking of it that way cause nappies are my thing.
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Postby sicksecretary » December 27th, 2010, 2:34 pm

I'll have to correct myself here. Losing control is certainly one of the best experiences a disgusting slut like myself can experience. But after helplessly ruining countless pairs of panties, I have grown accustomed to another exciting type of experience: Growing urges which I am capable of fighting... at least for a while. Oh yes, my last week has been committed to desperation. I was at my parent's place for three days and so excited about christmas all of a sudden, that I forgot about my bladder several times. I barely managed to avoid accidents. Weird and secretly exciting. One time I totally flooded my jeans, at least I made it to the bathroom. I could never bring myself to going while the need was still tolerable, because I simply didn't notice it. Almost like a little child who's simply too busy to notice.

On the train ride home, I once again realized that there was a bunch of mashed up bananas (i think) inside me, struggling to get out into my pants... it was a miracle that I made it home, but on the stairs up to my apartment, I lost control. Once again, a disgusting accident in my pants, but it was sooo relieving after the one hour train ride...

Master was very pleased when I reported about my trip and He promised me a fun evening so I'm eager to find out...
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