orientation

[gork151]

might be nice if there was some way to add orientation of members so that you could find like minded members... male dominate.... submissive male ....female domme .. female sub...ect

[sandy82]

might be nice if there was some way to add orientation of members so that you could find like minded members... male dominate.... submissive male ....female domme .. female sub...ect

Your suggestion, above, may prompt interested members to include that information in their biographical info. Others may not want to be bothered with people of like mind. I'm not sure what their motivation would be on that point, but it's entirely up to them.

An alternative approach is for you to publicize all your particulars in a "Meeting Grounds" post, on a scheduled basis, and see whether you attract people of like mind. The benefit here is that your action would be your choice, and nobody would be presuming on the time and interests of others.

[gork151]

i have shared pms thinking i was speaking to someone with one intrest when they were not even the sex or orientation i thought and tried to look at journals but can never figure out if they are male or female... when someone has a name like sandy i could not tell .. or bonnie or a host of other sn names

[sandy82]

The best advice I can give you is the advice I already provided. Tell people about yourself...in enough detail so they know something of substance about you. Not in a PM, but in a public post in the "Meeting Grounds" forum. Do it often enough to raise your post to the top of the heap. Or write in a journal with the door unlocked. Presumably you'll attract the people you find attractive--and who find you attractive.

Whatever your sexual preference (and it's fairly easy to guess because your total posts via Profile are considerably lower than your total posts via Membership--33 versus 122, the last time I looked several days ago), it won't appeal to a number of people, regardless of nick. I found your story about being a watchman on Mount Rainier to be quite interesting. I'm sure you have a repertoire of interesting and truthful stories. So do I.

Don't let your own inability to judge sex/orientation become a benchmark of personal success/failure. The chase is one of the fun aspects of the human condition. Others may be more adept than you are. There's a particular woman with whom you correspond on a regular basis. She is very smart and perceptive, has lots of common sense, and exercises good judgment. She's also pleasant. I bet she can give you some pointers.

As for Sandy, ever been to Scotland? Or Chris or Leslie or Evelyn in England? You'd never make it in the next state south of me. The Establishment is filled with men named Carter, Harrison, Beverley, Shirley, and Lee; and with women named Carter, Harrison, Beverley, and Lee--though you'd be hard-pressed to find a literate woman there named Shirley. At the same time, rural Oklahoma is probably littered (figuratively speaking) with tattooed mamas named Butch, Buck, Bubba, and JockItch. My suggestion: don't put much stock in names, even in R/L. And certainly not on a hypnofetish site. I don't know the names of male and female kangaroos, for example. Maybe an Australian can help you out there.

Good searching! But don't let your own failures lead you toward having others reveal what you should discover on your own.

i have shared pms thinking i was speaking to someone with one intrest when they were not even the sex or orientation i thought and tried to look at journals but can never figure out if they are male or female... when someone has a name like sandy i could not tell .. or bonnie or a host of other sn names

[gork151]

its ok sandy -- a grew up with sandford (sandy as my best friend and next door neighbor)... and then there was sandy down the street .. i understand the possiblity of male or female having the same name --i dont care that much - i dont spend much time in other forums and i am not really trying to meet someone here... i just thought and still do , that it was a good idea... i will slink back to my hole....

[cardigan]

Regarding the name Sandy - isn't it more or less a rule, that a male individual would have his name spelt 'Sandy', whereas a female would use the spelling 'Sandie' instead? Or do both sexes more or less use both spellings completely at random nowadays?

Ah - the good old days, when men were men and women were scared stiff! :P :P

[sandy82]

LOL, Cardigan, I wonder if any rules still exist in the US. Unlike many countries, the US does not have a list of approved names.

I was talking to a waitress the other day. She said her name was Mara, and I said it was a nice name. (High-level conversation.)

"Yep," she said, "it's short for Maraschino."

"Oh, is that a family name?"

"Nope, mama got it off a bottle of cherries."

- - - - -

At least it wasn't a jar of pickles. :wink:

Regarding the name Sandy - isn't it more or less a rule, that a male individual would have his name spelt 'Sandy', whereas a female would use the spelling 'Sandie' instead? Or do both sexes more or less use both spellings completely at random nowadays?

Ah - the good old days, when men were men and women were scared stiff! :P :P

[missypuss]

And what would Gork be short for?? I agree with Sandy .. The only way to determine the sexual orientation of someone on the site is to spend a little time paying attention to them via the forums, through the journals, and Private messages..try it , it really does help.....!!