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izatga88's Recent Entries

Not Feeling Right

by izatga88

I'm getting my hair styled later (no dye yet though), and I'm a little concerned right now. Last night, I spent probably 5 hours in a deep trance - my body felt like it was sleeping, but my brain was 100% aware of my entire loop most of the time. Not only did I wake up this morning to soaked panties again (I can only guess I've came more times in these last three months than I have in my entire life), but I.....can't shake this desire for (lol, now my typing is dying) cock & sex.

In previous months, my lack of any immediate responsibility during vacation/holiday allowed me to dive completely into the bimbo-washing and I completely turned into a bimbo-fucktoy so far as my brain is concerned. Vacation/holiday ended, and my smarts have returned, but it seems that my sensitivity and want for pleasure has kept increasing over time. I'm freaking out a bit right now since I have a TON of stuff to get done today, and I've already devoted an hour or two to pleasuring my tits......I'm having so much trouble stopping. On top of the sex drive, I'm SERIOUSLY hearing/seeing myself as a bimbo in the back of my mind, and thoughts of licking cum off of my fingers after a successful blowjob are causing me to almost pass out in waves of pleasure.

I have nooooo idea what's going on (I ~think~ I can still think straight), but hopefully this all quiets down shortly or I might be in a spot of trouble. I shall update either tonight when I get home or tomorrow (I SWEAR my tits are vibrating).

Comments

- xHeartx

I've heard it said that the only way to actually eliminate temptation is to surrender to it. It's usually said in a joking manner but there is some truth to it. Maybe you could strike some sort of internal bargain with yourself if you acted on your desire to get fucked. I'm sure that ultimately it would only be a stopgap measure, but you might be better able to "power through" your day if you knew that in the evening you would be getting fucked into a bimbo mush. I believe there is even a file to that effect, "night slut" or something like that. Good Luck.

- mutatedbunnyboy

Well if you live anywhere in near Derbyshire UK .... yo o/

- ztshp

Good very good the plan is proceeding acording to plan yes your a good girl and need bigger breasts

- nativedragon

Zt stop thinking of IZ as a object as she is and will forever be a human with human rights and i'm srsly annoyed with your attitude towards IZ and trying to make her be a object of pleasure =_=

- xHeartx

Izatga88 seems to be experiencing the effects of the files she has chosen as described by the files authors. I don't believe Ztshp has authored any of the files that have been mentioned so he can hardly be blamed for any effects she is feeling. He made a "Doctor Evil'esque" comment on a website named "WarpMyMind." It was actually rather amusing. Now, if I understand correctly, Izatga88 is a highly intelligent but sexually unsatisfied woman with a strong background in psychology. She has chosen files which have performed as described and where they did not meet her desires she has adjusted them to fit. She has demonstrated the ability to "snap-out" of the programming to avoid adverse affects to her life and livelihood. She is also aware of the general removal file. Knowing all this we must conclude that not only is no one "making" Izatga88 anything, but that any effects she is feeling are of her own choice and by her own hand. That makes your "white knight" routine at best sadly misplaced, or at worst evidence of the same kind of behavior as the woman who is currently stalking me. She has the same kind of protectionist attitude toward my love life as you are showing toward Izatga88. I would just like to be able to continue to enjoy reading about her experiences, please don't bring a lot of conflict into her journal just because you don't agree with her choices.

- izatga88

I don't mind Dragon at all, but what Heart is saying is correct. I'm not doing anything I'd ultimately ~not~ want to be doing (hence why I have yet to randomly grab a guy or ten and drown myself in a pool of cum - as fun as it would be, it would not be healthy/safe). While I'll certainly admit that there are some aspects of the hypnosis files that have either taken me by surprise or gone a little out of control, I've.....um.....(odd that the "bimbo" kicks in NOW) proven to myself that I can grab control of things if they get too out of hand......even if that may be a part of myself that I'm attempting to break. I will always have family close by in case something were to go wrong.

In other news, my hair is now longer than my shoulders, layered & straightened as straight as hair can be, and a bit of blonde coloring product away from having perfect "sexy blonde girl" hair.......DAMN it looks hot (no, I'm not posting it~ :P)

- ztshp

I was playing but I Must say that what is happening to IZ is just so hot, I would do her in bimbo mode....If I had the confedence...*looks down*

- xHeartx

Damn. It'd be nice to see some pictures. Any chance I could interest you in an exhibitionist file or two? Just kidding....sort of :)

- MsgtKane

I myself would much prefer a smart girl over a bimbo, that doesn't mean a smart girl being a bimbo in the bed room isn't fun. So I hope you're able to keep fighting it till you're in private with someone you trust. Lol Then you go all out in the bed room and hopeful go back to normal out of it, and be sure you have someone to encourage your normal life vs the bimbo. Having someone want you being a bimbo in your personal life will probably add fuel to the fire.

- izatga88

That might be the best direction to take it, but I'll have to land a great boyfriend first in order to try it out.

- ztshp

I voulentter, *sigh* I'll take one for the team...

- nativedragon

i'm by far nowhere near a white knight heart i'm just worried about some possible long term side effects (My ratinal and logical mind might be why i'm damn near impossible to put into trance =/) but over indulging in sex is a bad thing as as it can lead to fluid lose from cumming to much :| I would recamend the responsible slut file IZ as it'll help keep you from acting on a impulse that could hurt you mentally/physically or both i'm just trying to help ya cause i myself am a student of the human mind that's why i came here in the first place and IZ your experiment while it's being a succes right now just becarefull not to let someone take advantage of you when your in your fluffy pink cloud okay as i'm sure everyone here wouldn't like it if you got hurt due to your bimbo slut self kicking in =/

- ztshp

Dragon I know your worried about her but she is not an idiot stop treating her like one

- xHeartx

Still hoping for that update you promised :)

- izatga88

Update: Nothing to report.....other than sore tits ~ :P

- xHeartx

Playing with them too much?

- nativedragon

hey IZ any updates for us? oh and i've started to keep a journal on alil expiriment of my own :)

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